The Artists Work

[White-Winter]

The Artists Work


Minds are like parachutes. They only function when they are open.
- Sir James Dewar, Scientist (1877-1925)


Been practising for 3 years, my first shedding a tear, still unknown
Approaching the wider audience was the frontier like a stepping stone
Portraying a master work, capturing people’s heart
Misguided in confusion of ideas is abstract art
Intensive critics, all with different ethics, one not the same
Coming from posh childhoods they don’t understand basics, that’s my claim

A knife stroking each element like a fine brush
A hissing sound produced similar to an airbrush
The positioning all wrong cuz she twitches in pain
Starts over again by switching the frame
Time is of the essence, before the audience view the piece
A quick burst of brilliance, allows the artist to review the masterpiece
Taking away unwanted objects, clears the scene
Another completed project done by the obscene




The reporters enter the room taking photos of the piece
They are pushed back upon the arrival of the police
The artist had gotten away this time, but he was famous
Making the front page of a paper was the target, now he’s aimless
The whole country after a true mastermind
But he had moved on and left nothing behind

[White-Winter]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...=1#post7291568
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...=1#post7291576

[White-Winter]

open for feed

[Street!]

i actually really liked this alot....loved the whole thing could picture everything you were talking about and when the picture came out just made it that much better...great work here...good begining aswell it drew me in and you finished it up nice...great job...

[White-Winter]

thanks for the feed

[Calli]

this was not bad at all i like the whole dexter Murder is Art feel to it....was well done in that mannor.

the flow could have been tightened but the content was good and i think you paced it well leading into the next part of the story and kept it interesting.

Good write here man

[143]

this was very nice with the imagery, painted the picture to 95% completion then you filled in the last 5% with the last 2 verses. Ill direction on the flow too. I like that you put the image in the middle instead of before so the flow of the ready would not be distracted and sucks him deeper in the topic. The best i've seen lately.

[White-Winter]

thanks for the feeed....much appreciated

[White-Winter]

last up

[2triple0]

this was pretty good winter... i thought there were a few connecting details that you missed out on that would have helped the piece... like where you had the image and the last paragraph, it seemed like it was totally unrelated to the first part of the poem...i liked the bit in there about critics and how they think they know everything or at least i think that was the metaphor that you were trying to go for... anyways that was a really cool bar... keep writing man, you got talent... rtf on one of my pieces in OM thanks.. keep up!