Street Light

[Soule]

http://img12.deviantart.net/92d4/i/2...69-d3dno1f.jpg

I stand
in the center of this holy circle
beneath the street light,
darkness waiting to devour my heart.
If the bulb goes out...
I'm food for the sharks.

[Ctrl Alt Elite]

Cool little piece. Simple and effective. I love it when people use pictures with their writing. Especially when somebody takes a picture and writes something so original to go with it... The decision to focus on the street light was interesting - and the thought of it going out is actually some scary stuff.

I actually really enjoyed this. 6 lines long, and yet the piece has everything. Drama, A story, and a theme of terror (at least, that's what it evokes from me)

Nice. Real nice.

[Emily]

I stand
in the center of this holy circle
beneath the street light,
darkness waiting to devour my heart.
If the bulb goes out...
I'm food for the sharks.

Nice piece here. Short and sweet. A little too literal with the shark and all, but I get it.
I like the part that says 'darkness waiting to devour my heart.' that's lovely poetry right there.
And I do like the way this goes out, it's just that the shark is an obvious reference, which...I suppose having a picture there,
is the whole point of the reference. Don't mind me. I'm confusing myself.
'I'm food or the sharks' is a cool way to go out.

A short read. But written well.
Nice one.

[143]

I see the dependency for the provider's protection. I also see how it can relate to other things like if a person doesn't do a certain thing then I can't proceed or continue maintaining. Basically how life is set up. Your survival is based on a series of actions from other people to provide you the ingredients to live. the metaphor of it being a light in dark neighborhood with sharks around presents a very vivid image for conclusions to be drawn from. I applaud you for pulling that off in the brevity that you have. A perfect package...

[TheIllyricist]

Holy circle beneath the street light --- That's what I wanted to see more of within this piece, that's a great line (in two lines). Evocative, powerful, and calls forth a lot of images. I enjoyed the concise, to the point nature of this. You managed to pack certain concepts in, and fit around the art you selected as inspiration. Simply, the ending is both too on the nose and too cliched. Sea full of sharks, we've seen that and heard it too many times.

Otherwise, this was solid and an enjoyable read. Good material in a tight package.